Online Dating Security Issues & Advice
The 'Free Christian Dating Site' has been set up to provide an environment for you to meet people in a safe way. Where until you are ready you don't have to give out any personal or contact information. Now it is the hope with a dating site that people can meet develop connections and eventually swap details or even meet but just like you would with a stranger down your local pub please use good judgement to make sure your safe and not opening yourself up to someone miss-using this site.
We try to prevent and remove users who come on this website to spam and scam people but we need your help to use your good judgement and report to us an suspisious email or profiles.
Don't do ANYTHING before reading this page!
COMMON DANGERS WITH ONLINE DATING
1) The person you are communicating with may be married! Please use your common sense, if someone is acting suspisious contacting erratic or at predefined times this can sometimes be a warning sign of this.
2) Many overseas users sometimes run scams against people by pretending to get to know and like them and once you fall for them they start asking you for money. They need travel money, they are in trouble... If the person you are communicating with asks you for money, or is maybe having problems and your tempted to offer money watch out!
3) Some people will email you instantly asking for your email address and as soon as you give it, you are inundated with dating spam while never hearing from that person again.
4) Becareful with personal information! Personal information is your name, address, phone... everything... People can run a background check with basic information like your full name and age. This doesn't mean you should lie but just be careful and when handing out your personal details over the internet. Don't ever let anyone rush or pressure you into this step.
NEVER SEND MONEY SOMEONE MONEY!
IF ANYONE ASKS FOR MONEY, OFFERS FINANCIAL ADVICE, OR AKS ABOUT YOUR FINANCIAL AFFAIRS (EVEN AFTER MONTHS OF TRUST) DISCONTINUE COMMUNICATIONS. THESE ARE COMMON SCAMS ACROSS ALL SITES AND WE DELETE USERS THAT DO IT. IF IN DOUBT CONTACT US FOR HELP AND TO CHECK UP ON THE PERSON CONTACTING YOU.
DONT REPLY TO SUSPICIOUS MAIL.
Open it and flag as 'Suspicious' using our SafeSite options. Work with us to make our site more secure & safe for our users.
Online dating or Internet dating has been enjoying a very high popularity lately. However, despite the numerous advantages that it offers, in time abuse has increased, mainly due to its disadvantages. Online dating is fun and convenient, but you still should be very careful when speaking with people you do not know well. Here are some tips, following which could be useful to you and increase your security while you are dating online.
When you date on the Internet, be careful with people who look too good to be true. Start communicating only through e-mail. Watch carefully for any unusual behavior or contradictions. In other words read between the lines as far as possible. It is possible that the person with whom you are communicating is not the one who he/she seems to be. Trust your instincts. If something makes you feel uncomfortable pull back for the sake of your own peace of mind and security.
Keep your anonymity
Never include your family name, your personal e-mail address, your personal web site or Internet address, home address, work place or any other identifiable information in your profile or the first e-mails that you exchange with other users of the online dating service. Make sure that the signature of your e-mails is turned off or does not include any personally identifiable information, in case that you are communicating with someone through your personal e-mail. Stop communicating with people who press you for such information or try to mislead you to disclose such information in any way. Take as much time as you need to feel comfortable with somebody, before you provide some personal information about yourself. Ask questions and strive to get satisfactory answers. Again - trust your instincts, be selective and do not rush.
Be patient and trust your feelings
Careful and well thought out decisions usually lead to better results when dating and this is true for online dating as well. Do not trust anyone, who has not earned your trust. Every candidate should earn your confidence gradually, showing honesty and sincerity. It is your right to spend as much time as you need to find the person who deserves your trust and you should always be very careful. If you think that somebody is lying, this is usually so and you should react accordingly. Try somebody else who eventually deserves your trust. Keep your romantic spirit within reasonable limits. Do not fall in love in your own notion of somebody. Do not rush into intimacy, even if this is just online intimacy.
Ask for a picture
The picture can give you a good idea about the appearance of the person with whom you are communicating, which could help you judge this person correctly. In fact it would be best to see several different photos of the same person in different circumstances: informal, formal, at home, outside. If your requests for a picture are constantly being declined with various excuses, it is quite possible that this person is hiding something. The scanning of a photo is not an expensive service, this is why the possible excuses, why this has not been done are very few.
Chat on the Phone
Allowing for first time nerves, talking on the phone will indicate more of someone's personality, social and communication skills. Use a cell phone number, a local telephone or blocking techniques so your call ID No. doesn't appear on the recipients phone. Ladies especially, only give out your number when you're comfortable.
Meet only When YOU are ready
The best thing about meeting new friends online is that you can go at your pace, forming a picture of someone over a period of time and then deciding if you want to pursue the friendship in your own time. There are no obligations to meet anyone and you have the right to change your mind even after a meeting has been arranged. Keep your anonymity as long as your instincts tell you.
Things to watch for
In regard to personality - look out for: undue pressure, controlling behaviour, intense anger or frustration, passive-aggressive behaviour, suggestive or disrespectful comments, inappropriate phisical behavior.
In regard to identity - look out for the following inconsistencies: information on age, appearance, marital status, interests, profession, refusal to speak on phone even after some level of trust is established, failure to answer questions directly and openly, significant difference on and off-line, won't introduce you to friends, family or colleagues.
Still have doubts?.. most people are straight up and honest but if you're still unsure, even a degree of trust has built up, you're perfectly within your rights to request a passport / drivers license scan before meeting someone face to face. An honest person will oblige if you are genuinely concerned:)
Meet in a Safe Place
Once you decide to meet, tell a friend where you're going and when you'll be back. Give your date's name and number with that person. Never arrange for your date to pick you up from where you live. Get there yourself and meet in a public place when many people around. A coffee shop is a good choice. Make sure you leave before it gets late (ie when there is no-one around) on your own. Leave on your own. Drink little or prefferably nothing as your decisions will be impared. If you plan to go to more than one location - do not get into your dates car - use the tube or take your own. Don't go to someone's house (however comfortable they make you feel - they shouldn't ask this anyhow!)
Meeting in an unknown place or country?
Are you travelling from another city or country?.. book your own hotel and transport. Don't reveal the location of your hotel or allow your date to make arrangements for you. Drive directly to your hotel. Meet your date at a location you have already agreed to. Get there early and if the location is inappropriate or unsafe, return to your hotel. Contact your date from that location or leave a message. make sure a friend knows exactly where you are and can contact you. Carry a phone.
Getting out of a jam
Do not bow to any pressure to do something that you're unsure about. If you are scared by your date, make a polite excuse diffuse and leave. You may want to excuse yourself to call a friend, ask for help to slip out the back door. If you feel the situation is potentially dangerous, call the police. They won't mind if you are genuinely concerned. Your safety is paramount.
While liars, cheaters and imposters certainly apply their craft on the Web, you’ll also find them in nightclubs and offline dating services, cocktail parties or even sitting across from you at your local café. Regardless of where you meet someone, dating is never a risk-free activity, but a little caution will reduce your risk in matters of the heart.
Please look after yourself.
We urge all users to excercise a level of sensibility when meeting new people. Make the rule to only meet in a public place and remember: people who's intentions are not legitimate will eventually slip up in what they say so... take your time in getting to know someone and never be pushed - it's your call:) In the meantime we are working hard to give you features that will help you manage any unwanted mail. Be safe and thanks for your patience.